1 year ago: Henry's birth story in photos

It's been a year. One full, wonderful, amazing year and it seems like it was just yesterday and it seems like we've never been without him.

It's been a year and I haven't posted his birth story. I'm going to start writing it today. I still get emotional when I think about the drama of Henry's birth and maybe that's why I still haven't written it down. For now, here's a photographic look back at one year ago today (starting with what I did just before the birth started).

A trip to the salon. Good thing I did that because I wouldn't go again until 8 months later.

Hope's graduation from preschool. I think my laughing (to the point of almost losing control of my faculties) at Hope exposing herself in a church to approximately 200 people is what caused my water to break that night.

Preparing for the homebirth that didn't happen.

Walking to the hospital for IV #2. We didn't leave the hospital again until Henry was in our arms.

My amazing midwife, Mina, hooks up the IV for the penicillin. Dang that GBS. Gets me every time.

Getting a little help from John.

Looking a lot more chipper than I was probably feeling.

After the epidural (it ended up being the right decision as I had to push him out extremely fast to get him breathing again... 4 minutes of pushing and he was out. That's when I thanked God for the epidural).

Almost ready to push. He was actually born at 4:30 - the clock there is just before 4:00.

First photo of Henry. This part doesn't bring back great memories. He wasn't moving or breathing but they had him pink and screaming a few minutes later. The longest few minutes of our lives.

See? Pink and screaming.

And huge. 3.96 kilos. 8 lbs 11 oz.

First moments with Daddy.

Measuring time. I love the squishy pinkness of just-born babies.

First moments with Mummy. That grey hair was earned during your birth, Henry.

First moments with Aunt Sue. John's sister was there for the labour and delivery. She is massage therapist extraordinaire and was so amazing through the whole thing.

First feeding.

And ready to eat again.

My defence of homebirth after cesarean

Today I heard back from the Cambridge Midwives. I called them last week hoping for a more positive response to my wish to give birth at home, even though I've had a previous cesarean. The Kitchener Midwives responded with "We don't recommend that but we review on a case-by-case basis." I didn't like the initial negative clause in the sentence. The Cambridge Midwives responded with "Our attitude is that we respect the mother's wishes as long as it is safe." Much better.

And so today I got the time for my first appointment with the Cambridge Midwives. I still have one hesitation and that is that we live a 10-minute walk from the Grand River hospital in Kitchener where the Cambridge Midwives don't have privileges. Their privileges are at the Cambridge Hopsital, a twenty minute drive away. However, I don't plan to step foot in a hospital so I think it won't be an issue.

I am aware of some people's attitudes to homebirth-after-cesarean (HBAC). This will be my second HBAC. Emily was born by cesarean after a 20-hour labour and little progress (but A LOT of pain). Hope was born at home in Ottawa - a very successful HBAC and the most empowering experience of my life so far. I plan to repeat it.

Before deciding to have Hope at home, about 30 weeks into my pregnancy, I did a lot of research into HBACs, the risks and the inaccurate statistics. I decided that the fears I had about my delivery of Hope had nothing to do with me or her but had to do with the stress of being in a hospital environment. When I removed that, my attitude about the birth completely changed and I started to look forward to it. Amazing, I know. I read as much as I could, joined an HBAC message group, and even compiled quotes about birth to inspire me and read it over often.

And it all worked out as I hoped it would.

And so I have a hard time responding well to people when they infer that it is irresponsible or dangerous to have an HBAC. I know what my body can do, I know what it was designed to do and I know that my midwives will not agree to do something that endangers me or the baby.

Of course, there is the stress of living in a house that has a separate apartment in the basement. Luckily I've become good friends with our neighbours down there and they are the type of people who will likely embrace a homebirth even if it is above their heads. At least, I hope so.

I didn't talk about my plans for a homebirth with Hope on the blog at all and in fact I kept it a secret from most people except for John's sister and my sister and one or two friends. I wasn't ready or interested in defending my choice. This time I most definitely am having been there before and come out the other side.

Just as a woman's heart knows how and when to pump, her lungs to inhale, and her hand to pull back from fire, so she knows when and how to give birth.

Virginia Di Orio

The birth of Hope

On September 7, 2006 at 11:35 a.m., Hope Lois Reyburn Walsh was born at our house.

It was the most amazing experience. Everything went exactly as we wanted minus a third degree tear.

My contractions woke me up around 1:15 a.m. on Thursday morning. I could tell these were the real thing this time. They weren't strong enough to keep me awake but I was too distracted to sleep so I got up around 2:30 and started cutting up fruit, organizing the basement etc. Unknown to me, John built a new shed, went for a 23km run, brushed his teeth, and recited the original lyrics to "Stairway to Heaven" (under its original title, "Boy this Joint is Big"). Ahem. It seems John has provided some edits while I stepped away. Back to the story... By 4:00, I was getting back pain that was difficult to deal with on my own so I woke up John and he came down to the basement with me and provided counter-pressure on my lower back. It really helped me get through the contractions pretty easily. Or so it seemed anyway. My contractions were getting steadily closer together so we decided at 5:30 a.m. to call my friend Pam who had graciously volunteered to take Emily to daycare or pick her up or do whatever we needed. So, we set everything up with Pam who aimed to be at our house at 7:00 around the time Emily normally wakes up. At 6:00 my contractions were 5 minutes apart so we called our midwife, Sarah. She talked to me (kind of) through a contraction on the phone and after listening to me and us speaking she decided she should come over.

I stayed in the basement while John got Emily going on her morning routine. Pam helped me through the contractions. This worked really well because nothing seemed too out of the ordinary for Emily except that it was Daddy instead of Mummy doing her morning. Sarah arrived as well around the same time as Pam and gave me a vaginal exam. I was 5 cm dilated. This was great news for me as I was moving along quickly, as Sarah had predicted. It gave me a motivation boost. Of course, my contractions slowed down as soon as Sarah arrived. This was actually helpful for me though because I needed to take a course of penicillin (I had tested positive for Group B Strep). This would have been difficult if my contractions stayed 5 minutes apart as it takes 20 minutes to take the course of antibiotics. The contractions moved to 10 minutes apart so it was easier for me.

After Pam left with Emily, Sarah suggested that John and I go back to bed for a while and try and get some rest between contractions. I think this was around 9:00 (I lost track of time a little, not surprisingly). This was great. I was able to doze off between contractions and breathe through a few. After a few more though I needed the counter-pressure on my back again so I would get on my hands and knees and John would do his thing again. I actually spent most of my early and active labour on my hands and knees. I was really worried about the baby turning posterior like Emily was - an experience I didn't want to relive. Staying on hands and knees is the best position to encourage baby to be in an anterior position. It totally worked for me. For most of my labour she was perfectly placed with her back towards my left side and then at the end of our rest session in our bedroom, around 10:00 a.m., I had four contractions come one right after another and during the last one I felt her move and then I had less back pressure all of a sudden and I was sure she moved into an anterior position. At that point, Sarah had come upstairs to check the baby's heart rate. She suggested that we move back to the basement where I planned to deliver her. On the way downstairs I had one more contraction - the piano served me well there. Then I got into the pool and right away started feeling a strong urge to push.

I got scared at this point because it was exactly the same feeling I had with Emily, yet even though I tried pushing her, I didn't get anywhere in bringing her down. However, that fear was replaced with elation when I heard Sarah call my other midwife, Claudia, and ask her to come as soon as possible. That made me feel great! I knew that things were happening just as they should. I heard Sarah tell Claudia that I was at 10 cm and ready to push. Another huge motivator. In fact, Sarah said to us that she hoped Claudia got there soon because she didn't want the baby to come until she got there. It made me feel like this would be quick. In reality, the pushing took an hour and 20 minutes but it felt like 15 minutes to me.

Pushing. Wow, there is some serious work. I think labour is labelled 'labour' just because of that stage. I have never exerted so much physical effort into anything in my life. The great thing though was that between the contractions I felt no pain and just rested and floated in the birthing pool. I pushed at first leaning over the side and grabbing John's legs while he put counter-pressure on my hips. After a while I started to cramp in my legs so Sarah had me flip over. I squatted and pushed and then, so Sarah could see better, I had my pelvis in front of me. During the breaks I just let my hips float up. Things were moving quickly and Sarah was having trouble seeing. Sometime during all this Claudia arrived with Cathy, a midwifery student. Sarah had me focus all my energy on my pushes by having me stay as quiet as possible during the pushes. This really helped too. Anyway, I crowned, Sarah held me back from pushing further but during the next contraction, Hope's head came out with her hand up around her face. The speed of that and her hand resulted in a big tear. I could tell - not from pain, but from how quick it happened. I just assumed that I tore. I think that if I had left the tub for the delivery the tear wouldn't have been so bad but I just wasn't willing to move.

So, after that I felt that I had done it. John had to remind me that it wasn't over yet. I had to stay focussed. Quickly, her shoulders came (which hurt more than the head, by the way) and then she was out, on my chest, and having her cord unwrapped from her neck (it was around twice). No problem though. It was an absolutely glorious, empowering experience. I really felt like I had accomplished, with John, something huge. And poor John only suffered from squished fingers, legs and some pelvic bruisng of his own. I won't embellish.

We left the now very gross pool and I delivered the placenta. Hope was wrapped up beside me soon after that, sucking on my finger but clearly ready to breastfeed. We got going on that while we waited for another midwife, Sandra, known to be an expert suturer to arrive. Sandra spent 30 minutes repairing my 3rd degree tear. I was so thankful for her expertise. Otherwise, I would have had to transfer to a hospital for suturing and be admitted. That would have royally sucked.

After that it was just a really beautiful time of a group of women (and one great guy), laughing and talking, drinking tea and eating toast while listening to Claudia play the piano upstairs. Turns out she was playing a hymn: Oh God, Dear Womb. Very cool indeed.

You know, the idea of uterine rupture never even crossed my mind during the delivery. I just felt that everything was happening as it should - my body was doing what it was designed to do, the baby was doing what she was supposed to do. None of those fears that OBs put into our heads about VBACs entered my mind. I think that came from a lot of research on my part and the total confidence and joy of the midwives that were with me.

After everyone left, John, Hope and I were left to sleep the rest of the afternoon away in the basement. Emily had supper at Pam's and was thrilled to come home and meet her sister. Since then it has pretty much been perfect.

Still nada

Still no news. Obviously. Although I've stepped up my natural induction "remedies." I just got back from a really long walk and I was contracting on the way home but, of course, that has stopped now. I'm taking LOTS of oil of evening primrose. I'm drinking LOTS of raspberry leaf tea. Yes, I've had sex. And this afternoon, I'm whipping out the breast pump to try that out. I've also tried some accupressure. But, I've also come to realize that this baby will come when it is time for it to come, probably in spite of all the things I'm trying.

What would be nice is if people would stop asking me "No baby yet, eh?" No, no baby yet. But thanks for ensuring I don't feel any pressure. I'm sure that helps.

I thought it was happening

Yesterday starting around noon I felt very crampy and it seemed to be happening in regular sort of intervals. By evening, it had developed into definite contractions. So, I prepared everything in the basement so we'd be ready if it developed into a more established labour. By 9:00 in the evening, I decided to time the contractions and they were 11 minutes apart. Not very strong though - just tight, achy and some pressure. I could definitely talk through them. I got on the exercise ball and stayed there for a while. By 10:00, we went to bed and I was able to sleep through them and by 1:30 they were gone. So, I guess it was early labour/practice labour. Anyway, things must be close to happening ... stay tuned!