Henry

Henry John Reyburn Walsh, born yesterday, May 19, 2010, at 4:26 pm weighing 8 lbs 11 oz. Although we planned a home birth he ended up being born in hospital as his heart was showing signs of distress. Still a vaginal birth though and we're all great.

A very special afternoon

So first off, obviously... it was not the night. Thankfully I'm still pregnant and I'm assuming that I have about three weeks to go. Good. Because I have several things I would like to accomplish between now and then, mainly on the domestic maintenance front.

This afternoon I had my closest Waterloo friends over for a belly casting party. A belly cast is a popular way of preserving a pregnant woman's shape. It's usually done in the few weeks before birth. The basics are that the pregnant woman, with the help of friends/partner/professional belly caster (not necessary but I presume they get a really smooth finish on the cast), gets naked, slathers her body in Vaseline and then applies pre-plastered bandages (the kind doctors use to make casts for broken bones) to the torso, chest etc. You wait for it to dry and then wiggle out of it - the belly dance. After letting it dry for a few days, I can decorate the cast if I want. That will be a project for the girls and I in a few days.

My friends (Tamara, Jewel, and Sue (John's sister) ) arrived and we bunkered down with food, drink and chatting. My girls were so excited to have everyone come over; they could barely contain themselves. To the point of annoyance of their mother in fact. But, when the first crew arrived, with cousins in tow, they took off playing. We visited until Marnie arrived and then we got down to business with the casting. I stripped down to just my underwear and then we all started plastering me. The kids each had a turn as well - Emily was the most keen and kept putting more plasters on. Kennedy, the oldest cousin, hid behind the couch until my naked body was well-covered and then she started to peek over the top. It was really fun and really meaningful for me to have all my wonderful women helping me preserve these last few weeks of what will be my last pregnancy. I was glad that Julie arrived in time to stick on a few plasters.

It didn't take long to dry. After it was sufficiently hardened, I wiggled (what Emily called my belly dance) until I could pop out of it. It was nicely glued to my underwear so I had to pull and pry at those until I could unlatch it and then I was out and into the shower.

After the cast was done and I was clean, we went back to visiting, laughing, drinking and eating while Jewel gave me a heavenly foot soak and massage. Can you see why this was such a special afternoon?


I'll put up more photos as I get them. I'm going to remember this day for a very long time.

Tonight's the night?

My chiropractor told me today that she thought I would have the baby tonight. She was quite adamant about it. She said she "just had a feeling."

I'm willing to be at least 50 bucks that that is not going to happen.

However, my second midwife, Nasrin, who I totally LOVE, told me today that the baby is engaged and things could happen anytime although she expects me to deliver at 38 or 39 weeks. Of course, 38 weeks is in just five days (!). She was seriously excited about this. She's a passionate midwife and I love her attitude and approach. She also made my day when, after I mentioned that I'm a home VBAC (vaginal birth after ceasarean), she said: "Oh no, you're not a VBAC anymore in my opinion. You already VBAC'd. Now you're just a natural childbirther." I could have kissed her right there...which may have been awkward.

I'm pretty much ready with supplies and whatnot. We're having another homebirth which requires us to have a few things ready (by us I mean me, of course). I have almost everything in a bin... a bin that is clearly too small so later tonight I will transfer everything to a larger basket and then check against my list to make sure I do have everything in there I need. It's a pretty simple list really: towels, plastic tablecloths, something to use as hot compresses (I like to use cloth prefold diapers), a mirror (optional), olive oil, the "hospital supplies" kit from the midwives (includes hospital-grade stuff like peri bottle and those blue sheet things), thermometer. I'll be getting the tub from the midwives a few days before my due date which may mean I won't get to use it. Which would suck because it really helped me last time.

And as I write I'm boiling my herbal bath mixture that I'll use right after the birth for me and the baby. After it's boiled 20 minutes, I strain it, separate into two containers (so I can have another herbal bath the day after the birth) and then freeze it until the big day.

Next week my primary midwife, Mina, comes for a home visit and I'll also have my first internal which will give me some indication perhaps of any dilation that's already happened. (I do feel like I'm walking with a melon between my legs sometimes.)

Yesterday I was struck down with my first bout of sciatica. For those of you out there with chronic sciatica: YOU HAVE MY UNDYING SYMPATHY. It totally sucks and is extremely painful. I'll be glad to say bye-bye to that. Of course, it's a good excuse to not have to do the dishes since standing for any length of time makes it much more frequent.

And now, belly shots (I swear I look much bigger... or at least feel much bigger... in real life. And certainly people's reactions when I'm out and about make me believe that they think so too):

Operation "Prepare for Baby" coming along well

Today I planned to finish moving all the baby stuff that is currently taking up space in the sun porch to an upstairs closet so that everything is easily accessible.

That totally didn't happen.

However, I did take the new baby papasan, a lovely gift from my friends Tamara and Julie, out of the box and put it together. It only donned on me today that it was probably in several pieces and I should assemble it while I have a decent amount of sleep under my belt. I love that little chair and can't wait to have a baby cozying up in it.

I also started the formidable job of cleaning the fridge. The bowl of compostables I've collected so far is something you may have seen on Fear Factor at some point. I'm not quite finished but I'm well on my way.

Tuesday will likely become my sun porch day. I also have to finish sewing living room curtains. We've been here for 10 months now and I still haven't finished the curtains. John told me this would happen. I argued until I was blue in the face that I would FOR SURE GET THE CURTAINS DONE BY CHRISTMAS STOP BEING SUCH A PESSIMIST.

It kills me to say he was right but.... ugh, he was right.

Curtains are high on the list as our neighbours don't likely want to watch me birthing this baby if they can avoid it and this baby is likely to be born in the vicinity of the as-of-yet-uncovered windows. Priority, high.

And also on the baby front, Hope is completely in love with this in utero baby. Every morning, she finds my belly and starts kissing and hugging it and saying exactly this: "Good morning, baby. I missed you. I love you, baby. And you love me." Repeat. The night routine is very similar. "Good night, baby. I love you. And you love me. I'll miss you. See you in the morning."

It is really freaking cute. Not as cute when she wakes up crying in the middle of the night because "I miss baby. I need to kiss baby." Cuteness gone at that point.

Suspenders needed

My pants will no longer stay up in a way that covers my midriff or will allow me to look like anything but an old man with no bum.

And I'm wearing the giant panel-style maternity pants. And yet they still sag after mere minutes and leave me exposed.

I need some kind of shoulder strap system, suspenders or, I suppose, a mumu.

Car shopping

We seem to have decided, for the most part, that we should replace our car. Our current car is a 2002 Hyundai Elantra GT (that's a hatchback) with 170,000 km on it. The car has started to make some sounds. We've already put some good money into it this year. We'd be cramming three kids into the back seat together if we keep it, which is what we were fully planning to do, until the recent sounds started and we faced spending another chunk of money on it.

And so I started a search for a new car. I went to Mazda first. I've liked the Mazda 5 for some time and it does have an extra row of seating at the back making it a 6-seater. It also IS NOT A MINIVAN and don't let anyone else tell you different! I am so completely and totally anti-minivan. Not only are they supremely U-G-L-Y, they are also not fuel-efficient and too big for my tastes.

We test drove the Mazda 5 today. I loved it. There is one big problem though: John's legs are just a bit too long to be truly comfortable in the driver's seat. In fact, he has a little less leg room than in our Elantra hatchback, which totally blew me away. On the very large plus side, there is room for the three kids in there without being crammed in like sardines. Also, it handles great, is good on gas and is kind of sporty - decidedly not mini-van.

Last night I went to the Hyundai dealership. I drove the Tuscon (thumbs down!) and the Elantra Touring, the replacement car for our GT which they no longer make. I liked the Touring, not surprisingly since it drove just like our current car. It has a bit more cargo space in the trunk since it is a mini-wagon but we're faced with the same issue of cramming three car seats across the back and the only way that will work is if we buy a Sunshine Radian car seat for either the baby or Hope. If the baby is in it that will mean that I will never be able to cart the baby around in a bucket seat; I will always have to unbuckle and lift the baby out of the seat; not the end of the world, but inconvenient nonetheless. On the major plus side is that our current winter tires and roof rack will fit on the Touring, saving a bunch of money later on.

So, there is still no sure answer, no sign pointing us at the PERFECT CAR.

Any advice? What would you buy if you had three kids? Or maybe you already do.... if so, what do you drive? (Please don't advise a minivan.... I'm a bit pig-headed about my opinion on that.)

Not a great joke

I've been awake since 5:15 and I don't think it's a very good joke for April Fool's. In fact, I've been awake for portions of the last three nights, just unable to fall back to sleep. I can't even blame a wakeful in utero baby, or nasal congestion, or heartburn, or even a mind that won't settle down. I just can't get back to sleep. There's no reason for it and it is so. damn. annoying.

So, I'm going to grab my latest Ayelet Waldman mystery, settle back with something to drink (my thirst is off the charts right now due to the nasal spray I've been using to help with nightly congestion; the neti pot just ain't doing it for me) and hope I can grab a nap this afternoon.

Pregnancy Update: Hello, third trimester

It kind of surprised me, this third trimester. I had to check my little pregnancy ticker at the side of the blog to be sure what week I'm at - I'm in my 31st week! That means I'm officially in my third trimester (and have been for about 3 weeks, turns out). I'm feeling surprisingly good this week. The last few weeks have been an ongoing battle between heartburn, indigestion and sore hips with uncomfortable sleep thrown in for good measure. This week, the heartburn is almost non-existent as is the indigestion. I've had two good night's sleep in a row. I have no idea why but I'm enjoying it while it lasts. I think the reintroduction of coffee is the key.

One thing that has seriously helped me through this pregnancy (and my pregnancy with Hope) is ongoing chiropractic care. Right now I'm seeing my local chiropractor every week, which I think is a bit excessive but after my labour with Emily I am so focussed on proper positioning of the baby that I do what she tells me (it worked when I was pregnant with Hope).

I've had a few comments from people lately like this: Wow, I bet you're anxious for this baby to come out now! (And then when I mention my due date of June 1, a look of shock comes over their face.) I actually thought I would be bigger at this point, given this is my third baby but I seem to be just right for my body type and comfort level. Not that I care that a few people think I look big. I really like how I look when I'm pregnant and since this will be the last time, I'm enjoying seeing and touching my round belly. Here I am in all my glory:




The baby enjoys flipping... a lot. During the day I can still feel it do an occasional flip... nothing to worry about yet, although for the most part it is head down (much more comfortable than someone stomping on your cervix, let me tell you).

I'm in pseudo-training, not just for labour (although I know that my body knows how to do that so I don't really "train" for it), but for our trip to New York City (!) in mid-April. There will be a lot of walking - at the girl's pace of course - and my feet have to be ready. Right now, that continues to be my biggest complaint; I get really sore heels from the extra weight if I'm standing for very long. So, each day I'm trying to do a long walk. This afternoon I hope to do one after my massage (mmm, massage).

I've been woefully neglectful of blogging about the pregnancy. I had just started my blog when I was pregnant with Hope and it gave me much-needed subject matter. This time, with two other kids in the mix, it is a bit of a second thought. Until a few weeks ago I even had thoughts of "oh yeah, I'm pregnant" about once a day. That's not a problem anymore since this little babe enjoys kicking me in the ribs often. Hopefully now that we're in the third trimester around here, I'll make sure to do a bit of documentation more frequently. Otherwise this kid is already doomed to be the forgotten third child.

My name is Karen and I love my ever-expanding gut

The lovely Andrea of the Fishbowl posted this very inspiring and funny post about loving her guts. (Can I also just add that even in my pre-pregnancy state I would be soooo jealous of that gut - with or without the washboard?)

So, thinking along the lines of improving my post-Christmas diet as well as the fact that I haven't really written much about this current pregnancy, I thought this would be a prime time to talk about my own eating regime post-holiday as well as show off my pregnant belly.

Right after the last Christmas cookie was eaten (likely by me) I decided to get serious about what I was eating. Breakfast - high in fibre (a la Andrea); I am going to seek out the Bran Buds she mentions but for now I'm having oatmeal with flax seed meal on it, some cinnamon and maple syrup and milk. Yum! Lunch - a favourite salad of mine which I'm starting up again tomorrow: tuna, avacado, green onion, lettuce and a lemon and oil vinaigrette. Double yum! I won't have this everyday but lots of days until I get sick of it. I really want to lay low on the carbs at lunch - hopefully going carb free but high in proteins and veg (but not the heavy meats - fish and eggs and cheese are more to my liking). Supper - whatever is our fancy. I'm not making any changes there. I do plan to lay low on refined sugar from here on in as much as my will power allows going instead with honey or maple syrup when I need a little sweet. So far, not hard. I had my fill over Christmas.

This is the gut I am currently sporting at 19 weeks pregnant:




Formidable, isn't it?

Well endowed for only 19 weeks pregnant. I hate to think what I'll look like at 36 weeks.

Seriously, I'm obviously not re-focussing my eating to trim any pounds obviously. I love my baby belly right now. I just want to eat as healthily as possible for me to keep up my energy and feed this growing baby right.

As many of you know I have a mystery illness (which I still suspect is fibromyalgia but no one professional has been able to tell me yet) and eating well seems to help me through my bad bouts which, until two days ago, had been few and far between during the pregnancy. Right now I'm in the middle of one: severely itchy skin, rashes, extreme fatigue, sore muscles, very sensitive and painful skin (even where there is no rash to see), sore rib tips and solar plexus. All so odd but from experience I know that this too shall pass.

And for me that's where the joy in my suffering comes from. I know it will pass. It's always an adventure to see what I can do to get it to pass more quickly and I know diet and exercise (hah!) and lots and lots of sleep (double hah!) get me through faster.

And with that thought, I'm going to sit on the couch, knit, drink tea and then go to bed.

Should you want to feel good about your own midrif, I suggest staring at the photos above a few more times.

The first ultrasound

I went for my first ultrasound today. This is the earliest I've had any pregnancy ultrasound. Normally my first and only U/S is at 20 weeks. This time around though I've opted for Integrated Prenatal Screening.

I'm still a bit on the fence about it all. I wanted to do it because of my age (I'm 37 and will be 38 by the time the baby is born). But when I read through all the material again I was reminded of why I opted not to do it the first two times. First, you only get a percentage of a chance that there is something amiss with the baby. From there you have to go for further testing to confirm if anything is wrong or not. According to the literature I received, a lot of people who receive warning that something might not be right, go for further testing only to find out that nothing is wrong at all. Ninety percent of people who are told something is wrong, find out through the further testing that everything is fine. It seems like a lot of added stress for nothing.

So basically I'm not sure why I'm doing this and I sort of wish that I'd changed my mind sooner. I guess I was hoping to allay any worries and have the rest of my pregnancy be pretty stress-free. That is if they say everything is a-okay.

Anyway, what's done is done. And I got a very pretty picture out of it (our scanner is way back in Ottawa):


It is amazing how much detail in the face you can see at only 12 weeks. At one point the tiny peanut-shaped alien baby lifted his/her hand and waved at me. It was very nice to say hello. See you in a while, peanut alien.

Either popping early or sloppy fat

I'm seven weeks pregnant and 1 day. And yet I've already been forced into those early kind of maternity pants. Not the ones with the giant panel that we all love. Not even the ones with the four-inch band. But I am having to wear the ones with the stretchy waists, the extra elastic sewn in... you know the ones.

This is my third baby. Is it normal to start showing this early or have I just let myself go? Has my muffin top grown into a full spare tire?

Should I really be sharing this with the blogosphere?

Oh baby, this is just the tip of the iceberg of what I'm willing to share over the next 7 and a half months!

My defence of homebirth after cesarean

Today I heard back from the Cambridge Midwives. I called them last week hoping for a more positive response to my wish to give birth at home, even though I've had a previous cesarean. The Kitchener Midwives responded with "We don't recommend that but we review on a case-by-case basis." I didn't like the initial negative clause in the sentence. The Cambridge Midwives responded with "Our attitude is that we respect the mother's wishes as long as it is safe." Much better.

And so today I got the time for my first appointment with the Cambridge Midwives. I still have one hesitation and that is that we live a 10-minute walk from the Grand River hospital in Kitchener where the Cambridge Midwives don't have privileges. Their privileges are at the Cambridge Hopsital, a twenty minute drive away. However, I don't plan to step foot in a hospital so I think it won't be an issue.

I am aware of some people's attitudes to homebirth-after-cesarean (HBAC). This will be my second HBAC. Emily was born by cesarean after a 20-hour labour and little progress (but A LOT of pain). Hope was born at home in Ottawa - a very successful HBAC and the most empowering experience of my life so far. I plan to repeat it.

Before deciding to have Hope at home, about 30 weeks into my pregnancy, I did a lot of research into HBACs, the risks and the inaccurate statistics. I decided that the fears I had about my delivery of Hope had nothing to do with me or her but had to do with the stress of being in a hospital environment. When I removed that, my attitude about the birth completely changed and I started to look forward to it. Amazing, I know. I read as much as I could, joined an HBAC message group, and even compiled quotes about birth to inspire me and read it over often.

And it all worked out as I hoped it would.

And so I have a hard time responding well to people when they infer that it is irresponsible or dangerous to have an HBAC. I know what my body can do, I know what it was designed to do and I know that my midwives will not agree to do something that endangers me or the baby.

Of course, there is the stress of living in a house that has a separate apartment in the basement. Luckily I've become good friends with our neighbours down there and they are the type of people who will likely embrace a homebirth even if it is above their heads. At least, I hope so.

I didn't talk about my plans for a homebirth with Hope on the blog at all and in fact I kept it a secret from most people except for John's sister and my sister and one or two friends. I wasn't ready or interested in defending my choice. This time I most definitely am having been there before and come out the other side.

Just as a woman's heart knows how and when to pump, her lungs to inhale, and her hand to pull back from fire, so she knows when and how to give birth.

Virginia Di Orio

Whoa

To all men who read here: warning, there is going to be period talk and if you don't want to read it, you may want to go elsewhere for a while.

Since my weird health mystery started last February/March, my periods have been very irregular; mostly short. So short that some cycles were 19 days long. And take it from me, that really sucks. That isn't even three weeks between the start of one period and the start of the next. And so, I started tracking the length of each cycle just so I could see if there was any consistency.

There wasn't. Some cycles were 26 days, most were around 22 or 21 days. Sometimes I ovulated and sometimes I didn't. This was weird for me because I was always a consistent ovulator. A few pap tests and a pelvic ultrasound or two only resulted in doctors scratching their heads and shrugging their shoulders. "I dunno. People have irregular periods, you know." Very helpful.

And then we moved to Waterloo and I don't know if there is something in the water but all of a sudden I had two cycles that were 27 days long. Bliss! And a big money savings on tampons.

I figured things had changed, I was back to "normal" or as normal as I can be with still no diagnosis and nothing on the horizon that would lead me to believe I'll be getting one anytime soon.

And then it was Day 30 and I told John that it was Day 30.

And then I peed on a stick.


Surprise! Yup, we're having another baby. We're going to be parents of THREE children. THREE!

Holy Hannah.

Yes, we're excited. But, wow, we're still getting used to the idea two weeks later (almost), revelling in the joy of it but also the whoa-ness of it and all the stuff we have to do/consider/think about when we are away from home, our midwives, our normal stomping grounds.

THREE KIDS!