A day I'd like to forget

Today was hard. Really, really hard.

Henry wouldn't sleep out of my arms. Each time that I laid him in his bed, our bed or the swing, he'd be awake again (and screaming) in under five minutes. In desperation I put him in the chest carrier (my wonderful Ergo) and walked and sweat and sweat and walked while he finally slept.

This is all new as of today. Up until now I was telling people when asked that Henry almost always stayed asleep after I laid him down and I wasn't lying. Bur today a switch went off for him that put a stop to that. And you know what? That seriously sucks.

I'm really tired now and frustrated and my nipples are getting worn out sustaining a baby that now weighs 14 lbs 10 oz; he's gaining over a pound a week. That puts him in the 97th percentile for weight!

In the midst of this lack of sleep I'm getting some smokin' biceps, a sore back and a frustrated family who is getting as tired as I am of hearing Henry cry.

John and I have been discussing letting Henry cry it out at some point if this continues but I'm not comfortable with that at such a young age and what I've read supports that. I also know, after two other babies, that this is unlikely to last long but there is that little fear inside me that this could be the new reality for a while.

However I'm faced with the fact that if he's fed, changed and can see me, the reality is that I will have to let him cry long enough for me to hug my girls, make lunch, do laundry, or pack boxes. Not crying it out, but still crying.

Packing is what is on my mind right now. In less than three weeks we're moving back to Ottawa and we have maybe six boxes packed. This isn't good.

I don't know how tonight will go but I'm not expecting much sleep.

I do know how tomorrow will go. I'm going up the CN Tower with my three kids and I'm going to have a great time regardless of how Henry is doing.

And then in the days that follow I will pack. And Henry will cry. And we'll all survive.


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