No one wants to be laughed at when they're naked

This blog is suffering from not-so-benign neglect. And just when there are so many things to talk about. It's always the way, isn't it? Lots been going on, much of it blog-worthy. Before the goings-on are filed away in my grey matter, never to be retrieved again, I'm going to try to get a few posts up this week. Saying it here may actually make it happen. Here's hoping, anyway.

I have funny kids... very funny kids... but the funniest (although the jury is still out on Henry) is Hope. She makes us belly-laugh frequently, never due to effort on her part, and then she gets extremely agitated (read: stinking mad) if she thinks we're laughing because of something she said or did. Which we almost always are.

Evidence: this week she said something funny (again) while she was changing into her jammies and yelled at us: I don't like it when people laugh at me when I'm naked!

Which did not make us laugh less.

In the past couple of weeks she has reached a new pinnacle of funniness. I've managed to remember three good Hope-isms, using top-secret, tired mummy-brain techniques, so that I could get them down and then free up that brain space for things such as remembering library book day and where I left my hemorrhoid medication. This is important stuff people. So very important.

Laugh #1: Hope tends to take Henry's toys right out of his hands. Yanks them actually. I caught her in the act a couple of weeks ago and explained how even though he's a baby, you can't just grab things away from him even if you want them. You have to treat him like you treat other kids, blah, blah, blah. I walked out of the room and back in to see her with Henry's toy again. I asked her how she got it.

Hope: "I asked Henry for it and he said yes."
Me: "But Henry can't talk."
Hope: "Yes, he can."
Me: "Uh no, he can't."
Hope: "Yes, he can, Mummy."
Me: "But how do you know what he's saying?"
Hope: "I understand baby talk."

A minute later, Hope turns to Henry and says: "Henry, can I use that when you're finished?" (She leans in to his face and listens near his mouth as though he were a stuffed animal in one of her pretend games.) "You're done? Oh good. Thanks!" Yanks toy out of his hand.

Laugh # 2:
Hope: I got my chest skin stuck in this zipper today at school. [It was a decorative zipper on the front of a dress.]
Me: Why were you unzipping that zipper?
Hope: My hand was tired so I was giving it some exercise to give it more energy.

Laugh #3:
(at the dinner table)
Hope: Mummy, you forgot to give me the broccoli I asked for!
Me: Oh, sorry. I didn't hear you ask for it.
Hope: That's because I asked you in my head.

And just so Emily isn't totally left out...
I was changing Henry's diaper last week when Emily walked into the room and said:
Is there poop in that diaper?
Me: No.
Emily: Good! Because the last time I saw Henry's poop, it was terrifying!